A friend of my son drives me home in his van.

You won't have any complaints, dear Essie Gotback, about your son's friends, right? I say this because the guy not only takes you home when it was about to start raining, but he also just fucked you so hard that you're going to come home more than happy, hehe. Of course, you shouldn't tell your son about how well his friend fucked you because I don't think he would take it well, honestly, these things between young people don't usually go down well...